Updating participation rubric and catching up on past assignments.
Schema and Focus
Plan: Tease out the areas of the worksheets that didn't get completed and complete them in the time suggested on the worksheets. Try to get as much done as possible so I can be current and not behind. I hate being behind! Organize worksheets, label first group of handouts as 1, 2nd handouts as 2, 3rd as 3, and 4th as 4. Write "done" on the top of each worksheet that is complete. Time spent = 20-30 min.
Reflection: At this time, I am still not yet able to force myself to stop at end of the suggested amount of time to work on an assignment and move on to the next without feeling disappointed and frustrated. I find that I want to complete it fully and satisfactorally. I spent way more than the allotted 100min b/c, but I had a lot of work to do, and it is NOT due to procrastination. How do you compromise in your mind what has to be done with lack of completion? This is an area I need to work on with myself. However, I am able to do piece-work on worksheets, meaning, I can complete one of the several tasks on a worksheet, that which I feel is most pressing, and come back to the others later. This is a step forward for me.
It's interesting that on this Choice worksheet it says, "Learners need to make their own decisions about when, how, and what 'bits' to learn in any learning task. Learners who lose the ability to make decisions are 'depowered.'" I feel like I have to do it all and learn it all to do these assignments and get the most out of it and that we are going to be graded on this when you evaluate what we have done and/or learned (that grade-reward-punishment mentality that is still fixed in my mind). Yet, the new behavior has been to make the choice to do the tasks when and how I decide it is best for me to do it. I am learning...baby steps. I realize this serves to empower us, but it doesn't feel empowering yet. I also realize this is a result of having difficulty assimilating or accomoding or changing my existing schema!
Engagement Level: 6
I'm really glad to see you have developed an organization system that works for you! I appreciate your dislike of that "I'm behind" or "what if I miss something" feeling, as that is the hardest part of prioritizing and making choices. You are doing a great job, take as many small steps as you need until you get where you want to end up. Keep up the hard work and you will find your natural balance.
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